written in lowercase, because the shift key is where anger lives.
you may smoosh freely. every smoosh is final at the moment of smooshing, which is also true of life, but heavier. no smoosh can be unsmooshed, and mr smoosh thanks you for not asking again.
mr smoosh draws every picture himself, with his tentacles, which is why they look like that. the art you receive is yours to enjoy, print, and defend at parties. bragging rights over rare pulls are real and enforceable in the school-yard sense.
credits buy smooshes and, occasionally, extremely real merchandise. purchases of actual objects (shirts, stickers) are governed by the actual laws of actual commerce, which we obey with unusual seriousness for a cephalopod-based enterprise. everything else is play money in the best sense.
the daily smoosh paper publishes on weekdays at six. its editorial standards are: did mr smoosh like it. corrections are printed never, because the paper is always right, because it says so in the paper.
provided as-is, tentacles and all. we do not warrant that any smoosh will be beautiful, only that it will be sincere. sincerity is the house style.
we are not liable for: attachment to a particularly good pull; the phrase "one more smoosh" spoken after midnight; strong opinions about which sticker deserved better. our total liability shall not exceed one (1) sheet of stickers, mildly crinkled.
disputes are resolved by mr smoosh, whose rulings are gentle, final, and delivered in lowercase.